Admit it: A film with the tagline “Sorority babes: the other white meat” is an interest-piquer. Watching that film, however, is another story: “The Cook” will leave you with nothing but indigestion.
This “horror comedy” is lean on the former and nonexistent on the latter. The film places a new cook (Mark Hengst) in a sorority house; he’s actually the typical homicidal maniac, but at least he tells the girls he’s going to kill them all. OK, so he does so in a foreign language they don’t speak, but still.
Over one weekend, the ladies get high, play kinky sex games and bitch about everything under the sun, yet come together as sisters for mealtime, at which the cook serves up whichever girl he most recently killed. Everyone but the vegan thinks the food is scrumptious, unaware they’re eating a fellow member of their pledge class.
“The Cook” is tasteless, which wouldn’t be so bad if it also had actual laughs. It also doesn’t help that the cast of sisters harbor entirely repellent personalities; as sick as it sounds, you won’t miss any of them as they make their exits. In fact, you’ll wish he’d take them all at once.