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Creep Van


Buckle up!

Rod Lott December 4th, 2012

Says a concerned mother in the opening scene, "If I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times: Stay away from vans. Only bad people own vans." Truer words, ne'er spoken, especially in the case of Creep Van, an independently funded flick of horror from the heart.

creepvan

For his sophomore effort, director Scott W. Mackinlay has reassembled much of his cast and crew from 2006's Gag, including Brian Kolodziej, who takes the driver's sear as Campbell, a young man forced to accept a lowly gig at a car wash after being fired from a grocery store for stealing porno magazines they don't even stock.

Being without wheels, Campbell wants to buy a dirty and dirt-cheap van he finds for sale; says co-worker/love interest Amy Wehrell, "It looks like the poster child for rape prevention."

That's really the least of the vehicle's problems, because it's driven by a guy who has booby-trapped it to do away with those who dare inquire about acquiring it. A busty blonde (super-sexy Lisa Waishes-Cornwell) finds its seat belt cutting into her shoulder, while a bikini babe (Angelina Armani, Chromeskull: Laid to Rest 2) gets her head smashed in its spring-loaded side door.

To no one's surprise, it's in the sick that Creep Van finds its stride. While the film has a healthy sense of humor, one could argue successfully that it's too jokey — verging on Troma, at that — than need be. (Speaking of, Troma head Lloyd Kaufman cameos, because he can.) When it most counts, in Act 3, Mackinlay leaves the laughs in the dust, but I wish he had done that much sooner, as that tone doesn't mesh as well with Kelsey Boutte's convincingly grotesque effects as he might think.

That said, I can't help recommend that horror fans scream, "Shotgun!" and buckle in for an 80-minute ride. As a throwback to old-school slashers, you could do a ton or two worse. I was never bored by what transpired — a target at which more microbudgeted projects should take care to aim. —Rod Lott

Hey! Read This:
Chromeskull: Laid to Rest 2 Blu-ray review  



 
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